Friday, March 25, 2011

The Tao of the Black Bag

PART I.

Being Present, Living Mindfully


"Why aren't you on Twitter," I am asked. "Why don't you blog more often?"

Jean-Paul Sartre asserted that it is necessary to choose between living life and telling stories about life. The never-ending act of transforming existence into a coherent, cohesive narrative is so intrusive and invasive, he suggested, that it prevents the author from simply absorbing sensory, emotional and intellectual input.

For a certain type of person, at least, Sartre is evidently right.

You know the type; they are constantly using their iPhones to update their Facebook status, constantly texting, constantly posting new pictures to the Web. They are, in other words, so busy telling everybody about what they're doing right now that they hardly have any time to enjoy the experience itself. They're hardly even paying attention to the experience at all. To some extent, yes, we all do it. But for some it is a pathology, an addiction.

Fame is often characterized as a disease or disorder. The type of person described above suffers from "micro-fame." Nothing is done for its own sake; everything is done for the benefit of your audience of readers and followers. This attitude separates you from your own life, turns your life into a packaged product.

You must, I believe, be able to immerse yourself fully in an experience -- to commit to it, to invest yourself in it, to engage with it completely. This does not preclude, however, writing about it later. You might operate under the assumption that at some point in the future, after you have had a chance to process and assimilate the totality of the experience and frame it in the greater context of your life, you might (or might not) attempt to distill it and capture it in words. Knowing this does not prevent you from living in the moment.

I reject the idea that one must choose between exclusive modalities. What one must do is know where to draw the line. If your awareness of the need to tell the story is interrupting the experience -- interfering with it -- then you need to pull back.

It has been widely theorized that in this online era people would be able to present themselves to the public in a totally controlled, inherently false and misleading way. We would see not the real person but a Photoshopped avatar -- a loose, malleable representation that can be enhanced, manipulated and distorted at will. Your online persona can be smarter, funnier, more successful and more interesting than you are: you as you wish to be, not as you are -- an upgraded mythology of yourself.

It is no longer the realm of speculative futurism; we now live in that universe. And you know what? The thing that I find ironic and surprising is not how effectively we have each created, modulated, edited, adjusted and fine-tuned this artificial construct -- it's how most people have completely failed to do this!

They post photographs with no captions, no explanations and no apparent relevance. They post images of random celebrities or animals as their own profile pictures. They post bizarre, rambling, incomplete thoughts pockmarked with spelling, grammar, punctuation, capitalization and syntax errors and dripping with omissions, inconsistencies and factual inaccuracies.

In this age of Wikipedia, Google and Spell Check it would be so easy to look smart. You wouldn't be able to tell who was clever, well-rounded and intelligent with so much information (very literally) at everyone's fingertips. It never ceases to amaze me that despite the minimal effort required, people don't take advantage of these things. It's not as if you even have to get up out of your chair, walk across the room and actually get a dictionary down off the shelf. Half the time they don't even bother to proofread. They post comments like, "there was this movie i forget who was in it or what it was called but there was this guy who . . ." Oh, for crying out loud! Just look it up on IMDB!

An increasingly common attitude is, "why should I do it in real life and expose myself to risk when I can play a computer game that simulates the experience with no risk?"

PART II.

Choosing Experience, Choosing Reality


Since this is a blog about motorcycle travel, I can safely talk about the fact that I ride. I have learned not to bring this up in general social situations. If I mention motorcycles or motorcycling to non-riders, the usual immediate standard response from them is to begin telling me some gruesome, gory tale of horror. It's a weird but consistently predictable reaction. So I have trained myself to avoid the topic. (Years ago I wrote a short essay devoted to the subject of the skewed perception of risk you can read HERE if you are interested.)

It is well documented that human nature causes vivid, dramatic threats like shark attacks seem much scarier than long-term, invisible, intangible threats such as high cholesterol. A shark attack is an extremely remote possibility and hardly worth worrying about for most people most of the time. High cholesterol is likely to kill you. But the shark attack is vivid and dramatic while the high cholesterol is long-term, invisible and intangible . . . so you see some fat person sitting on the beach, afraid to go in the water, eating a double cheeseburger with extra mayonnaise and a jumbo order of fries. That is faulty hazard analysis.

Fear is a poor reason not to do things.


If something involves risk, evaluate the risks. Minimize the risks. Manage the risks.


Don't avoid doing things -- do things right! Do things safely!

People's reactions to hearing about someone else's adventures are often obliquely apologetic and subconsciously defensive, freighted with rationalizations.

    "I wish I could buy a motorcycle but . . . [insert excuse]."
    "I wish I could get my pilot's license but . . . [insert excuse]."
    "I wish I could sail around the world but . . . [insert excuse]."
    "I wish I could learn to skydive but . . . [insert excuse]."

The most common excuse is "my wife won't let me." It's usually followed by a self-deprecating laugh, but I don't think it's humorous; I think it's kind of sad. I don't mean to seem harsh or judgmental, but that doesn't sound like a fulfilling marriage. I would hate to think that I was somehow standing between my wife and actualization. If she really wanted to have an experience, it it were really important and meaningful to her, then I should be supporting, encouraging, facilitating and enabling in every way I possibly can -- that's what best friends are for. Inversely, if my actions or presence in her life were preventing her from achieving her goals I would feel (rightly) very guilty and depressed about it. If Trish wants to do something, then the way I see it it's my job to do everything in my power to make it happen. I fell in love with her because she is who she is. Why would I want to change that? Why would I want to hold her back? That doesn't make any sense.

PART III.

Setting Priorities, Allocating Resources


The second most common excuse is "I can't afford it." This statement makes me wince. Unless you are living in abject poverty (and some are, but usually not the ones using this excuse) this probably isn't really true.

Ten Levels of Wealth (measured as a function of lifestyle)

Notice that the levels are not associated with hard numbers such as annual gross income. That's because what matters is your CIRCUMSTANCES, not your account balance or net worth. The two key factors are the real cost of living where you reside and your own personal (perceived) lifestyle needs.

The phrase "basic fundamental human needs" as I use it here includes (A) nourishing food and clean water, (B) clothing adequate to the conditions, (C) adequate shelter, (D) health care and hygiene and (E) access to education and work.

Level 1: It is impossible to obtain the basic fundamental human needs.
Level 2: It is extremely difficult to obtain the basic fundamental human needs.

NOTE: For perspective, according to the World Bank, almost half the global population -— over three billion people -— live on less than $2.50 a day. At least 80% of humanity lives on less than $10 a day.

Level 3: Obtaining the basic fundamental human needs requires all available resources.
Level 4: Obtaining the basic fundamental human needs requires most available resources, with little left over.

Level 5: Some disposable income is available for discretionary purchases.
Level 6: A significant amount of disposable income is available for discretionary purchases -- spending on entertainment and consumer goods becomes a substantial part of the budget.

Level 7: Enough money is available to cover all expenses and still put aside for savings or major purchases (such as a house).
Level 8: It is possible to live comfortably while simultaneously amassing increasing savings.

Level 9: It is no longer necessary to choose between saving and spending; there is enough money to live very well with no great danger of running out.
Level 10: Unlimited extravagance.

As a practical matter, once a household hits Level 10, additional wealth is just a figure on a ledger with no impact on your lifestyle. Let's face it, the difference between having $5 million and $50 million in your personal checking account is effectively nil. (Although I'm sure many millionaires would emphatically dispute that assertion.)

Since there are so many multi-billionaires out there these days, it might make sense to add a ridiculous Level 11 to this list -- more money than you and all your staff, entourage, ex-wives, mistresses and illegitimate children could ever possibly spend.

The disparity is staggering. Roughly 42% of all the wealth in America is held by just 1% of the U.S. population. Most people (the bottom 80%) hold just 7%.

With all this in mind, people who are at the mall buying clothes and music CDs, DVD players and iPods, new cars and new furniture can't logically or accurately use the "I can't afford it" excuse. "I choose to spend my money on other things" would be more correct.

So why do so many people make excuses? And why do others choose to get out there and do things? What makes the difference?

I think it essentially all comes down this: many people prefer to cling to a comforting, idealized, glamorized fantasy rather than embrace an imperfect (and perhaps sometimes disappointing) reality. The truth is usually messy, complicated and difficult. A dream can remain abstract and therefore flawless.

Some people apparently want things to be simple and beautiful. Reality is rarely simple and often ugly. Reality can be dirty, annoying, uncomfortable, boring and challenging -- complex and riddled with paradox, ambiguity and contradiction. Navigating reality requires sacrifice and compromise. Trying to bypass, sidestep or circumvent these aspects of human existence on Earth entails hiding, withdrawing, cocooning, protecting oneself from authentic experiences rather than accepting them or seeking them out.

Take climbing Mount Everest, for example. The statement "I climbed Mount Everest" sounds exciting. The reality, however, involves spending days in a tent at base camp playing poker to pass the time while waiting for the weather to break. It involves altitude sickness and hypothermia. It involves physical exhaustion. It involves great expense. Adventure equals excitement but it also equals adversity, uncertainty, danger and discomfort. But that's not a reason not to go if climbing Mount Everest is your dream.

The distinction between a dreamer and a doer is therefore nothing more than a willingness to overcome that fear of contaminating the perfect fantasy with imperfect reality.

I have been on many, many imperfect trips. But as imperfect as they were, they were still better -- far better -- than all the theoretical perfect trips I didn't actually take. There is never a "right time." We can sit around and wait for the "right time" forever. The "right time" is fiction.

"Go small, go simple, go now," say world cruisers Larry and Lin Pardey, who have been ocean voyaging since the 70s. My own version of that motto, applied to motorcycle touring, might be something like, "keep it cheap and hit the road."

PART IV.

The Black Bag


The Black Bag is my one key piece of equipment. It is no accident that I use a picture of it as the header of this blog, nor is the capitalization arbitrary. It is not just a black bag; it is THE Black Bag. It is emblematic of my travel philosophy. All I need to do is grab the Black Bag, along with a change of socks and underwear, and I'm ready for an adventure.

A few of the most important contents:

  • A bottle of Excedrin. I try to never be without this. If you've ever been sick while traveling, you know how miserable it can be. I get terrible headaches (especially when I forget to eat) and the only thing that gives me any relief is that combination of acetaminophen, aspirin and caffeine.
  • A toothbrush, dental floss, a pack of tissues, nail clippers and tweezers. A minor problem like a hangnail or something stuck between your teeth can drive you to the verge of insanity when you're on a trip and can't take care of it.
  • A comb and a hairbrush. When I stop to eat, get gas or check into a hotel, taking just a couple of seconds to clean up slightly is helpful. When I look like a scruffy, unkempt, disheveled bum I'm less likely to get prompt, courteous service.
  • A pair of sunglasses.
  • A bottle opener. (You can see it in the picture.) It's a souvenir from the Alaskan Brewing Company in Juneau. I picked it up during a brewery tour. Ever been caught without a bottle opener? That can be aggravating. People get mighty creative when they're desperate.
  • A couple of safety pins. These can be amazingly useful in a variety of situations.
  • A battery-operated electric beard and mustache trimmer. I figured out a long time ago that it's much easier to keep my facial hair trimmed than it is to try to actually shave every single day, especially when I'm on the road.
    Shampoo, deodorant and bath soap. Not every motel offers these and most campgrounds never do.
  • A Leatherman multi-tool and a Swiss Army Knife. (Unless I'm going to be traveling by airline. Then I leave them at home.)
  • A small LED flashlight.
  • A pair of earplugs in a tiny protective case. These really save the day when you're trying to sleep in a noisy place.

It is the simple things like this, plus some good, solid, basic riding gear (capacious luggage, comfortable gloves etc.) and NOT the perfect $20,000 touring bike or two weeks of paid vacation, a large travel budget and an exotic itinerary that facilitate a rewarding trip. A great trip can be three days and $100. Just go. Just. Go.

Keep it cheap and hit the road. I'll see you out there.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

A Preliminary Plan Begins to Form

Trish and I discussed it, took a few notes and clicked on a few links the other night and it looks like we've developed an early outline for The Big Ride.

We're talking about a three-week (ish) trip, with a focus on the parklands of Southern Utah.

We would begin by going northwest (through the Ozarks?), taking a full six to eight days to get to out there.

Then we'd spend an entire second week exploring places like Arches, Zion, Capitol Reef, Bryce and Monument Valley. During that time we could either establish a single base and do a series of hub-and-spoke trips or else change lodging a couple of times along the way, probably mixing in some moto-camping.

Then we'd head across the border into Arizona, stop at the Grand Canyon (preferably a seldom-visited part of it) and then proceed due east across Texas (maybe spending a night camping at Big Bend and later catching some live independent music acts in Austin) and Louisiana (maybe including a short side-trip into New Orleans) and finally back to Florida over the span of that third and final week.


View Larger Map

(The map above is interactive, not a screen cap.)

We'd strive to keep the daily average mileage relatively low -- it's about a 6,000-mile route, so at 21 days that would give us about 300 miles/day, with an occasional 400-mile or 450-mile day here and there (when the weather's nice and the road and traffic conditions are easy etc.) plus a couple of zero-mile "break days" as well.

We'd stick almost entirely to secondary highways and remain well off the beaten path as much as practical. We would maximize opportunities for unexpected diversions and be open to schedule changes when things caught our interest. We'd try to make lots of time for checking out museums, historical markers and exhibits and weird roadside attractions. We'd take brewery tours, hike, eat at unusual local restaurants (NO NATIONAL CHAINS) and allow serendipity to guide us on a largely improvisational kind of journey between flexible objectives.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

A Short But Nearly Perfect Ride

As much as I love cross-country rides, the local jaunts do have a couple of advantages.
  1. They require minimal planning and preparation -- you can just walk out the front door and go.
  2. You don't have to pack gear for a wide range of possible weather conditions, from wet to dry and hot to cold.
  3. You don't need to schedule your life around them; there is no need to request time off from work or have the Post Office hold your mail.
Today's officially stated objective was to ride to the "U-Pick" strawberry patch about ten miles from our house and harvest ourselves enough fruit to keep Trish busy for the next few days making strawberry pie, strawberry tarts, strawberry jam, strawberry pancakes etc.

The ride itself was wonderful -- the route took us down two of the prettiest roads in Seminole County: Highway 426 through the Little Big Econ State Forest and Florida Avenue south of Lake Jesup.

Trish on Florida Avenue.

The ride was wonderfully scenic and the weather couldn't possibly have been nicer. Although lots of other motorcyclists were also out enjoying this fine March day, traffic overall was light. We rode past horse farms and cattle pastures, past signs advertising homemade pottery and warning drivers to watch out for deer and gopher tortoises, smelling fresh-cut grass and orange blossoms.

But then (as always) came the unexpected development: the patch was closed -- fenced off and chained up.

With a laugh and a shrug, Trish realizes that our mission has gone awry.

One of the things that I love so much about Trish -- and one of the most important, primary and fundamental reasons why I would consider embarking upon an epic long-distance ride with her -- is that she has an amazing ability to roll with sudden changes, to improvise, to adapt, to relax and enjoy herself when events do not unfold as intended. While some (many? most?) would pout, whine, complain, fuss, sulk, pitch a fit, throw a tantrum, fly off the handle or generally be a pain when such cracks, puddles and craters in the pavement of life appear, Trish never loses her perspective. She just smiles, makes a joke and alters course.

Not getting bent out of shape about things, she once told me, is her mutant superpower. I have learned to embrace her motto, which is, "It'll Be Fine."

So we turned around and headed back to Geneva. The ride back home was as delightful as the ride out there had been. In the driveway she high-fived me and I gave her a kiss. I can think of worse ways to spend a warm, sunny Sunday afternoon.

A Long-Overdue Repair

Well, Pancho's clutch finally gave out. It began with a gradually worsening sticky-slippy feeling but then it deteriorated until it finally became difficult -- nearly impossible -- to shift gears in the conventional manner. I was still able to speed-shift once I was moving along at a brisk pace, but getting started from a standstill required accelerating slowly and cautiously . . . totally unacceptable in real-world traffic situations.

The ride to the dealership in DeLand was, to put it succinctly, terrifying. (The greatest obstacle was the steep driveway ramp; if I didn't carry enough momentum through the 90-degree turn to carry me up the incline, I would get stuck since I could not roll on the throttle rapidly. But I made it.) Once that challenge had been overcome, however, the next grim specter to confront was the looming price tag. Doing a complete clutch rebuild was going to cost so much that I seriously considered buying a new bike. Then again, I had already invested a great deal of time and money in getting the Suzuki modified and configured just exactly the way I liked it, so I did not relish the idea of starting that whole process all over again. Anyway, nearly ten years and more than 126,000 miles isn't bad for the factory-original clutch, so I guess it's not such a bad deal.

By the time they were done, I had a new clutch, a new master clutch cylinder, a new slave clutch cylinder and a new clutch fluid line -- all of which look oddly clean and shiny compared to the weather-worn, battle-scarred rest of the bike. Now I'm hoping this fix means I can hang on to Pancho at least into 2012. I know a replacement is ultimately inevitable, but I'm hoping to put that off as long as possible -- maybe even long enough to collect all 48 states.


Monday, February 28, 2011

Moto-Camping

It's an art and a science. It has advantages and drawbacks. It adds color, flavor and texture to a journey but it can also impose additional hardships.

My bike, with all its storage space, is well suited to moto-camping; my system (as shown below) is to secure my sleeping bag and tent to the rack on my topcase using a bungee net with hooks. Simple, but it works.


Then I put all my clothes and other personal items in one side case, an inflatable air mattress in the other side case and all my miscellaneous bulky riding gear, maps, tools etc. in the topcase.

The primary benefit to moto-camping is that it's usually very cheap. This really helps to stretch the travel budget.

A secondary positive aspect is that it introduces an element of adventure. You feel just a little bit more intrepid when you sleep in a tent, a tad more self-deterministic, marginally (albeit temporarily) more free, less connected to society, less encumbered by the constraints of civilization. There is nothing quite like enjoying a campfire under the stars out in some remote area all by yourself.

There are, of course, also some significant minuses. First of all, it takes much longer to settle down for the night and much longer to get going again in the morning; you have to work this into the daily schedule. Whereas checking into a motel is typically quick and easy, setting up camp takes time and effort.

Another problem is that you leave yourself vulnerable to the whims of the weather. If it's cold and rainy, camping might sound less appealing than a real bed indoors, particularly if you've been riding all day.

And lastly, there are no hot showers, no flushing toilets, no pizza delivered to your door. Of course, that's the whole point. But if you've just banged out 500 miles and you're tired, stiff, sore and cranky you might be in the mood to take it easy.


The picture above shows my improvised campsite on a perfect late afternoon in 2006: I got there in plenty of time to set up my tent before it got dark, it was a lovely day for being outdoors and the ride that brought me to that spot was not excessively arduous.

My own guideline for moto-camping is to limit it to no more than one-third of a trip. Of the remaining two thirds, those nights should be divided between ordinary motels (for economy) and more offbeat lodging -- such as art hostels, bed & breakfasts, tree house cottages, spa resorts or crashing out on a friend's sofa. While it's tempting to become over-reliant on hotels, I have often looked back to realize that some of my most memorable moments on the road were at the more unusual and exotic overnight stops.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

The Story of Y.T.

Trish and I had been riding together ever since she started traveling down to Florida in late summer of 2007 -- she rode on the back of Pancho, which was a less-than-ideal arrangement for her because the passenger pillion was small, narrow, too firm and generally inadequate. I had never intended the Bandit to be used to carry a passenger, so the Corbin saddle I bought to replace the OEM seat was designed for my butt alone, with a short pillion tacked on as an afterthought.

Even so, we had some great rides to some cool places. And she never complained, even when it rained.



Trish took the ABATE course up in Indiana in 2008 and got her motorcycle endorsement. I couldn't have been prouder or more enthusiastic; it was one more item on a long list of things we can share and enjoy together. She seemed pretty excited about it so I asked her if she would be interested in having my backup bike, a 250cc Honda Rebel, to practice on. She eagerly said yes.

"Are you SURE," I pressed, "because I'm totally serious."

"Yes, I'm absolutely sure."

"OK then."

And with that, I embarked upon one of the more memorable rides of my life . . . not the longest distancewise or timewise by a long shot, but memorable nonetheless. I rode that Rebel from Orlando to Indianapolis -- in November.

It was a thousand miles through chilly mist and drizzle on that little bike. The Rebel has a lot of positive qualities, but long-distance comfort is not among them. It was a bit of an ordeal, but I survived.

I left the Rebel there and flew back to Florida. Trish practiced riding around her apartment building, mainly in the parking lot across the street.


Trish named the Rebel "Y.T." after a character in the Neal Stephenson novel Snow Crash, one of her favorites. The arrangement worked well until Y.T. was inexplicably towed. To this day we have no idea who had the bike towed or, more importantly, WHY.

I had to fax a bunch of notarized documents officially designating Trish as the custodian of the bike (it was still registered in my name and we weren't married yet) before she could reclaim it from impound. It was an enormous headache, and we'd love to know who the hell initiated that silly pointless nonsense.

When we moved all of Trish's stuff down to our place in Geneva, we had no room for Y.T. so our good friend Danni was kind enough to keep the little Honda in her garage for weeks while we made arrangements to have it commercially trailered down to us. (I was not particularly inclined to fly up there and  ride Y.T. back down to Florida, although I would have if that had been the only economically viable option.) THANK YOU, Danni! As if hosting our beautiful, fabulous wedding reception hadn't been enough!

So now, at last, Pancho and Y.T. are reunited and they sit happily side-by-side in our driveway. Trish and I have been taking a series of rides of increasing length together, starting with short loops around the local area and culminating with our most ambitious excursion yet, a scenic jaunt up to DeLeon Springs State park, where we had a lovely midmorning pancake breakfast before turning around and riding back.

We've put together a list of places within day-tripping range that we'd like to do on our bikes (such as Canaveral National Seashore) as well as our first overnight trips -- possibly including an offbeat treehouse lodge in south Georgia that Trish discovered online . . . and/or possibly stays in Athens or Savannah.



Eventually, I'd love to take her to one of my very favorite riding destinations, Two Wheels Only. (I posted five pictures of that place on here page and another 14 here.)

And ultimately, of course, the goal is the Big Ride of 2012 -- although that remains a distant, vague and elusive objective shrouded in question marks. Y.T. may or may not be Trish's mount of choice for that undertaking, but there is plenty of time between now and then to contemplate possibilities and alternatives.

A Curious Sight

Last night I spotted this unusual situation: a girl on a Honda CBR waiting for someone at the "Arriving Flights" area of the main terminal at Orlando International Airport.



It made me smile and filled me with a sudden rush of fond nostalgia for those heady days in 2007 and 2008 when Trish would fly in from Indianapolis and I would pick her up from MCO on the Bandit at this very same exact spot. She would have her helmet and riding jacket with her on the airplane. She'd climb on the back and then we'd ride out to Geneva or over to Quest Air Hang Gliding.

It's good to be back in Florida. I'm indescribably, immeasurably glad that coming back from a trip now means coming Home (with a capital H) to Trish. "Going back" used to mean the end of a painfully short interval of togetherness. Now it means the end of a period of separation.

When we lived 1,000 miles apart, meeting up meant days or weeks of planning. It meant spending a lot of money. And it meant a frenzied attempt to maximize every second we were in the same Zip code. As exciting as that era in our lives was, I'm glad it's over. The ultimate luxury commodity, we've found, is being united geographically as the natural default option. All the resources we used to invest in achieving that can now be reallocated to other projects. (We call that the Togetherness Dividend.)